How does one diaper an alligator?
The following steps are crucial and must be followed to the tee. If this is not possible you have a baby ninja and I have much respect for you.
The following steps are crucial and must be followed to the tee. If this is not possible you have a baby ninja and I have much respect for you.
Step one: Procure diaper and liners.
Step two: Find baby, most likely over harassing cats.
Step three: Lay baby on the floor (or changer or any safe surface) and prepare for a change.
Step four: Have angry baby yell at you loudly. (How DARE I interrupt his play time.)
Step five: Give baby cellphone to keep him occupied.
Step six: Baby throws phone. (First he checks to see if his girlfriends photo is on the screen)
Step seven: Baby rolls away while you try and stuff the diaper.
Step eight: catch baby, attempt number one at applying diaper.
Step nine: Baby performs alligator roll, effectively escaping from the diaper application.
Step ten: come to the conclusion that baby is a nudist.
Step eleven: quickly diaper the baby.
Step twelve: give up on reapplying pants.
Congrats, you just diapered an alligator.
Step two: Find baby, most likely over harassing cats.
Step three: Lay baby on the floor (or changer or any safe surface) and prepare for a change.
Step four: Have angry baby yell at you loudly. (How DARE I interrupt his play time.)
Step five: Give baby cellphone to keep him occupied.
Step six: Baby throws phone. (First he checks to see if his girlfriends photo is on the screen)
Step seven: Baby rolls away while you try and stuff the diaper.
Step eight: catch baby, attempt number one at applying diaper.
Step nine: Baby performs alligator roll, effectively escaping from the diaper application.
Step ten: come to the conclusion that baby is a nudist.
Step eleven: quickly diaper the baby.
Step twelve: give up on reapplying pants.
Congrats, you just diapered an alligator.
I mean baby.
Tips:
Do no sit on your child, this is definitely a no no.
A lightly placed foot might work or distract baby. I’ve given this some thought but haven’t tried it myself I’m not that flexible or coordinated.
Praise baby for laying still when they are so they eventually learn. Keyword being eventually…
Do not let pets nearby they will distract the baby with their furry selves.
23/02/2011 at 5:24 am Permalink
I will admit to laying a leg on either side of the alligator, I mean baby to try and keep him contained.
23/02/2011 at 5:26 am Permalink
haha, this does little for my alligator, he sees it as a challenge and rolls right over my legs and looks at me like really mom? thats all you got?
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23/02/2011 at 6:38 am Permalink
GREAT post, Claire! And so glad my baby is his girlfriend!